I agree with @zztri , you're not a small man, you're a damaged man. It is normal to fear this feeling, it is normal to fear to trust again, so take your time for that. Nobody is asking you to meet someone and trust them the same day, that takes time even for people that haven't gone through what you went through. Best advice I can give you is tell the person you feel affection for what happened. Explain to them your damage makes you fear the closeness, that you don't know when you can trust again but that you are willing to find out. Nobody can guarantee you it won't happen again, but is it worth to not love again because you can get hurt again? If you don't want anything happening to you, you might as well lie in your coffin and close the world out. Then you're safe, but you won't feel love, trust, closeness or intimacy either. It's you that need to take the risk again.
16/10/22
You're not a small man. You're a wounded man. Wounds heal. Trust me, I got cheated on when I was young. Now I'm 42, happily married for over 16 years with three kids.
16/10/22
Man most people get cheated on. It’s really heartbreaking, I know. But in the end it is just a hurdle you gotta overcome, to find the right one for you. I could never cheat. I just can’t. But I got cheated on in many relationships before. But if I would be assuming every woman will cheat on me, I would be blocking open doors in front of my eyes. The good ones are out there, they’re just hard to find.
16/10/22
i have a simple rule , dump the cheater or what do u think will happen after a few months ???
16/10/22
Takes about 3 years with therapy, are you taking any?
16/10/22